Free Bird

Throughout our lives, we as humans, constantly seek freedom. Whether traveling to discover new worlds, fighting to gain equal rights for all races, or speaking out for same sex marriage, humans are always on a mission to find freedom. However, for some, we seek a different kind of freedom. Like the wife in Charlotte Perkins Gilman’s story “The Yellow Wallpaper”, we seek freedom from ourselves and from our minds. Although most are not familiar with this idea, I can easily relate to the not-so-normal hopes and aspirations of the ill-minded house wife in “The Yellow Wallpaper.” Regardless that her and I’s way of thinking may not be the most popular way, we each are in our own battle for freedom.

Possibly suffering from post-partum depression, equally suffering from the lack of sunlight, the narrator of “The Yellow Wallpaper” has a unique way of thinking about things. Her husband, a respected doctor, has diagnosed her with an illness that he believes rest will cure. Yet, little did he know that the room she would spend most of her healing process in was, in fact, the room that would eventually cause her death. This room had a “modern” look to it. The room’s genetic makeup consisted of barred windows, tattered yellow wallpaper, and a bed that was bound to the floor. But somehow, considering all of that, the narrator seemed to like the room and even went on to say, “I’m getting really fond of the room in spite of the wallpaper. Perhaps because of the wallpaper.” This statement, I believe, was Gilman’s first attempt at foreshadowing what was to come. The hours spent “resting” in the room allowed the narrator to aimlessly stare at, trace over, and analyze every corner of the walls. Ultimately, she began to see what she believed was a woman behind bars inside of the walls. After being trapped inside the parasitic room for months on end, she finally snapped and decided to “free” the woman in the walls. She locked herself inside the room and then violently stripped all of the wallpaper off. In the midst of doing so, her husband frantically tried to open the door, yet when he finally did, he passed out at the sight of his dead wife.

The average reader would analyze the story as a crazy lady who was really ill and needed to be hospitalized. However, I’m not the average reader, and my opinion differs. At one point in the story the narrator says, “Life is very much more exciting now than it used to be. You see I have something more to expect, to look forward to, to watch.” She is excited because she is intrigued by the thoughts that the wallpaper provokes. Before being kept in the room, her husband was gone frequently on “business trips”, she was treated child-like, and she often had nothing worth experiencing in her life. Now that she was able to see the things she saw in the wallpaper, her depression gave in and shed a little light of hope on her life. She had hours to spend with her thoughts, and in my opinion, she began to seek freedom from not only her lifestyle and depression, but from her thoughts as well. The yellow wallpaper began to symbolize her life. She felt like a woman, trapped behind bars, trapped in her thoughts, and trapped in her depression. However, the more she thought, the more the solution became evident to her. She decided that by ripping the wallpaper off the wall, she would free the women made of shadows behind the bars. Yet, if there is no wallpaper, there are no women. So by ripping the wallpaper off of the wall, she was killing the shadowed women, but that was the solution. Sometimes the only way to gain freedom is to stop trying to gain freedom. The narrator sought freedom from her life. She sought freedom from the depression that consumed her and from the thoughts that drowned her mind. The only way to gain that freedom was by ending her life. And by doing so, she set herself free.

We all desire freedom in some form or another.  Although we all do not travel the same paths, we all are on the same journey. I relate to Gilman’s character in more ways than one. Not only do I understand her mindset and her logic behind her ultimate demise, but I too think some of the same thoughts. In a world that is constantly evolving, it becomes difficult to remain content with how things are. People can have zillions of dollars in their bank account and be miserable. Yet, some can live in a box and be the happiest people to walk the green hills. I struggle with the idea of being satisfied with who I am. I believe that every day I should strive to be better than the person I was yesterday. However, because I am human, I have faults. My mind is a constant Ferris wheel of ideas that continuously spin and never become solved. The question “what if?” is permanently rooted into my brain. At times, I find it difficult to be content with what I have accomplished and what my life consists of thus far. My thoughts consume me. There is no such thing as “analyzing” anymore because over-analyzing is my native language. However, these ideas that I struggle with, I have struggled with my entire life. These ideas that I struggle with do not cease. And, just like the narrator in “The Yellow Wallpaper”, I seek freedom from my thoughts. I seek freedom from my lifestyle. I seek freedom from my anxiety. But the road I am on has not led me to an answer. Little pieces of wallpaper shed glimpses of light on me to give me hope, but none have given me freedom. Regardless though, like the rest of us, I will continue my battle for the freedom I believe in until I am able to set myself free.

Freedom is not easily gained. Ships may sink, races may be killed by the millions, and homosexuals may always be persecuted, but we as humans will never stop fighting. The narrator in Gilman’s “The Yellow Wallpaper” sought freedom and ultimately gained it. Although her way unique, we all will travel our own road in hopes to set ourselves free.  

Crazy Ol Lady

A bit kooky, maybe even a little senile, but definitely big hearted, the grandmother in “A Good Man Is Hard To Find” is a complex character. With a story plot as twisted and unpredictable as the one Flannery O’Connor writes, the grandmother’s character is even more profound and important. Not only is the character a key character, but she is also easily relatable to.

Flannery O’Connor begins the story by introducing a family of characters, each character seeming to hold a very pronounced personality. The family speaks of a road trip they are planning to take to Florida however; the bold grandmother has a different trip in mind. She blatantly states that she would much rather go to Tennessee because there is a misfit out on the loose and she doesn’t want to run into him. Her effort at persuading her son to change his vacation plans failed miserably and left them packed up and headed towards the sunny south. The trip down consisted of the grandmother constantly nagging, telling stories, and reminiscing of old times. Yet, one memory caused her to lead her family blindly down an old dirt road to what she had remembered containing an old plantation home at the end of. Halfway down the road though, she remembered that the house she was thinking of was in fact in a different state. Her memory jolted her from her seat, sending her cat flying and the car into a chaotic mess. The family ended up stranded on the road after their accident, only to be met by three burly men, one which happened to be the misfit. The misfit then proceeded to one by one kill off the entire family, only leaving the cat as a survivor.

The grandmother, although a bit off of her rocker, seemed to be the key component in the story. O'Connor spends a good portion of the story describing her, using her dialect, and making the reader aware of her profound personality. At the introduction of the story the two grandchildren June and John carried on a conversation with their grandmother about why she didn’t want to go to Florida. John tells her that if she doesn’t want to go that she should just stay home. However June makes a remark that really lets the reader into the type of personality the grandmother has when she says; “She wouldn’t stay at home to be queen for a day.” While on their way to the sunshine state, the grandmother talks about all the things she has seen, reminiscing, and pointing out what she considers to be important landmarks. A majority of the time, the children have toned her out or are sleeping, yet the resilient grandmother continues to talk and talk. All the while she’s reminding her son of the correct speed limit, and chastising the children when they begin to act foolish. Her personality is very domineering, yet caring all the same. Finally she begins telling a story that sparks the attention of the two young ones. She talks about a plantation house that she thought was beautiful. However, knowing that her son would never take a detour to see it, the manipulative grandma embellishes the story by adding that the house had a secret panel that may contain something behind it. The kids became ecstatic to see the house and would not take no as an answer. The father unwillingly turned the car around and started driving towards the old road. The grandmother obviously showed her pride in her accomplishment. However, after her sudden memory and the car accident that left them stranded, the grandmother’s personality begins to slightly change. When she encounters the misfit, she immediately tries to be the strong one for the family, begging and coaxing the misfit out of his evil ways. She even tries to make the misfit believe that he is a good person so that he may spare her family. At one point she begs, “You shouldn’t call yourself the misfit because I know you’re a good man at heart. I can just look at you and tell.” When faced with possible death, her personality went from very reassuring and confident, to weary and fragile. As her family one by one went into the woods with the men to be killed, she became more and more frantic. Losing her calm and collected mindset, the grandmother opted for spontaneously saying anything that came to her mind, reaching out, begging and pleading. She even screams out multiple times for her only son. At her last attempt to change the misfits mind, she makes the mistake of touching him, resulting ultimately in her death by gunshot.

O’Connor has a way of portraying characters so that they seem one way and when faced with dilemmas they reach a moment of grace.  The grandmother in the story is portrayed as a very strong and bold-minded character. However, by the end of the story, her strength seems to be broken because of the demise of her family. The grandmother in the story is easily related to my grandmother. Both women very witty, manipulative, and controlling; yet, each of them care about their families whole heartedly. I can remember taking a trip to New York two summers back. My mom, my grandpa, my sister, and my grandma were all packed up into one car. All nine hours to the city, my grandmother didn’t stop talking unless it was to take a breath and then she continued again. She told all the stories she could think about just like the grandmother in the story did. When we drove through certain states she began reminiscing. We reached Delaware and she spent the entire drive through the state telling a story about a man she had met in Delaware. By the time we stopped for lunch, every single one of us was bleeding from the ears at the sound of my grandmother’s voice. Yet, because of her strong minded and controlling personality, none of us dared stop her from speaking. The grandmother in the story talked endlessly regardless that nobody was listening a majority of the time, as did my grandmother. But just like the grandchildren in the story, there is always one story that my grandmother tells that catches my attention. When she began talking about her grandmother that we were going to visit in New York and how long it had been since she had seen her, my grandmothers strength began to weaken. She talked about her grandfather who had died before I could meet him; and, she explained how excited she was for me to meet her grandmother. She took my hand and began quivering a little, describing how big of a moment it would be for her. Just like the grandmother in the story, when faced with life changing moments, her personality took a turn. She became quieter and calmer. She spoke less and when she did speak it was almost impossible to make out what she was saying. Like the women in the story, my grandmother seemed to be in a trance. Whether my grandmother or the grandmother in the story though, both are strong and self-reliant women with big hearts for the ones they care about.

The plot in “A Good Man Is Hard To Find” sets the perfect scene for the character of the grandmother. O’Connor does an amazing job of describing the grandmother and obviously showing her shift in personality when faced with a difficult situation. Not only is the plot a perfect story line for the grandmother, but the grandmother herself is a key component to the story. Her character leads the story around every corner. She narrates her memories and tells of every state the family passes through. She also sets up each big event in the story. Regardless of her unique personality though, she is easily related to my grandmother. Each grandmother, theirs and mine,  possess the same type of key personality traits and huge heart. O’Connor does an incredible job of writing a not so typical story with a really not so typical character. 

White Elephants

When I say that I think almost every women can in some way relate to "Hills Like White Elephants", I mean almost EVERY women. At first, the short story is read without much thought or effort. However, after analyzing it and hearing others' opinions on the story, my view was completely changed.

The story begins by introducing two main characters, the American and Jig. The characters go on to have an elaborate discussion about whether or not they should go about having a procedure done. It is up to the reader to decide what procedure they're talking about but I chose to believe that they were discussing an abortion. Jig, the girl, is very hesitant and resisting the idea. Yet, when the american begins to describe how much better their lives would be and how much more he would love her, she begins to agree.

I think that in more ways than one, I can relate to this story. At one point in my life I was willing to do just about anything for someone that I truly cared for. Jig seems very naiive and easily manipulated. She is in a relationship with a man she believes loves her and is telling her all the things she has always wanted to hear. However, she is battling with herself for what she wants and what her morals may be. I can relate to that because sometimes in life, we forget who we are and what we stand for because of trivial things.

I think that Jig, although possibly young, should have known that she is the keeper of her body and has the right to keep the baby if she wanted. But because of the American influencing her otherwise, she chose not to. Unfortunately women get put in positions like this on a daily basis all over the world and may not believe that they have the power of their word and power over their bodies.